Playing Fair

   I am the third child of four. I learned early life is not fair. By the time there were four of us running around, playing fair pretty much went out the window and it was more survival of the fittest. An older sister stepping on your foot and pushing you backwards, breaking your toe in the process, wasn't fair. But then it probably wasn't fair of me to play cosmetologist on my little sister by Nair-ing her eyebrows... sorry for the chemical burn! Or for the countless hairdos my brother sat through as the only boy, only to be told "Be nice to your sisters" in return. Bottom line when you are a kid, though, is that fair or not, at the end of the day, you get tucked in your bed to sleep as long and deeply as you wish while your parents tip toe around and make sure all is well in the world. Well, now I am learning that the "fair rule" doesn't give grown ups a break at all and no one tip toes around me anymore.
  Jameson and I have talked a lot recently about how some people just seem to float through life without many troubles. I totally understand that everyone has issues to deal with and that just because they are not visible does not mean everything is peachy. But sometimes, what is visible, just makes you want to scream "That's not fair! It is my turn!" I am in no way writing this as a pity party for ourselves or our situation or to wish harm on anyone who is not visibly dealing with issues. I just want to be real. To let my girls know that sometimes life is not fair at all. Sometimes just when you think things are finally looking up and you are starting to get ahead, you get smacked right in the face and sent back down to start building up again.
   We have so much to be thankful for in this family. I have two beautiful girls who are healthy. A husband who is working more overtime than regular hours lately, just trying to get us ahead. To be completely honest, though, the more he works, the harder we get smacked. It is as if someone is watching the scales and realizing, hey wait this side is starting to come up, better mess up the heat pump and send a $700 electric bill their way! But, as Jameson always reminds me, we make it. We always make it somehow. Just when my serious doubt face turns on and the tears are on the brink, something comes from out of the blue and we scrape by. Everytime.
   So, my little ladies, fret not. Mama has learned first hand that life is not fair. I promise to be there to teach and remind you to be nice to each other and take turns, but I will not do you the unjustice of promising things are equal. When you are small, I will tip toe around when you are sleeping and make sure all is right in your world. When you are older, I promise to remind you that things have a way of working themselves out and you will get by. I won't be able to tell the world and everyone you encounter to play fair with you, as much as I wish I could. I promise to listen and get angry with you when you get the short end of the stick, but I won't apologize for it. Because as Daddy and I are learning, as much as it would be nice to "float" for a little while, we would not change a thing about our life for the world. After all, we got the two most loving, hilarious, beautiful little ladies the world has to offer... and that is just not fair to everyone else.

Vada at 7 Months

Smiley is the word I would pick to describe Vada at this point. This little lady has the biggest, face-consuming smile that you cannot help but either smile back or give her a huge kiss. All it takes is a glance in her direction or a smile directed at her to suddenly feel pretty darn good about yourself. She seems to have gotten over her fear of unbearded men and truly has become such a happy, content baby. She STILL has not done a deep belly laugh, but she definitely finds some things funny to which she responds by squealing. I guess it is true about little girls; the high pitched, ear piercing squealing that I am sure will stick around for the next few years. Lucy is particularly good at getting this sound out but Daddy's tickles, peek a boo, or Mama crawling across the floor to her will do the trick too. Bath time is a new favorite too since she can sit up and splash and play with Lucy. She is a total ham with a camera and will go from content and watchful to big cheese in no time. 

   One thing Vada does not smile or laugh about is food. I have offered a couple of different things that I made at home for her to eat; pears, carrots, oatmeal as well as avocados, bananas, and yogurt. As soon as the spoon hits her lips, her mouth buttons, her head shakes side to side and the arms start flailing. This is generally followed by screaming until I give up and calm her down by nursing. I decided just to give in and try some store bought baby food, Earth's Best Organics, and she ate the entire jar of sweet potatoes. The next night, half a jar of pears. Since then, nothing. I really don't want to push her to eat food if she is not interested since I am confident she is getting everything she needs from nursing. A baby doesn't get to 22 pounds by starving :) Nor by sleeping through the night. Vada likes to be asleep by 8pm then usually wakes up before 10 to eat again. Sometimes she will then sleep until 1:30 before she wants to eat then again around 4. She still sleeps either in her crib, the swing, or in bed with us depending on her mood. She does like to stretch out with both arms as far out to the side as possible so sometimes the crib is the only option. She has lost interest in her pacifier so either nursing or rocking are the ways we are getting her to sleep. I guess I am just not exhausted enough yet to work on some self soothing.  

   We are still waiting for any teeth but the drooling, chewing, and now a runny nose are sure signs it is not far off. She has also started getting one leg behind her and rocking to try and grab toys that are out of reach which just petrifies me. I am loving the stage she is now, happy to sit and play and watch and discover on her own without me worrying about her getting into things or disappearing from view. She is a mover and a shaker so I know when she starts moving there will be no stopping her. 
  Vada is definitely a Mama's girl. I love when I am holding her and someone talks to her and she smiles at them then plays shy and turns into my shoulder. It makes me feel like she has a secret that only I know and I will soak that up as long as I can. She gives the best hugs and kisses, as well as the most aggressive. I find myself being super protective of her since she does not demand attention the way her big sister does. Being her mom, I know just how amazing this little lady is and I want everyone else to know it too. I already see that she is much more laid back than Lucy which means she sometimes sits and plays by herself instead of being in the center of it all. Maybe that is why I am not miserable with getting up in the night with her. Some days it is the only time that it is just her and I. So, this is another area where I am learning constantly how to parent each child individually. For now, all I know is this little woman is growing up so incredibly quickly and becoming even more loveable with each passing day. You hold a special place in Mama's heart, my Belle, and I love every bit of you. 

Sun Bun Saturdays

Fresh baked pastries. A morning with daddy. Vada's cheeks in her winter hat. Our little Lucy turning into a lady right before our eyes. Pretty swirls on a latte. Old people telling us to enjoy this time with our girls. Tapestry tablecloths. Downtown Chestertown. Perfect Saturday mornings that pulled us through the crappiest of winter months... Evergrain Bread Company and Sun Buns

Life Lately

Well, it has been quiet on here for quite a while. Between four consecutive weeks of sickness with the girls, one blah mama during the month of February, lots of overtime for Daddy, a new computer that I want to throw across the room every time i use it am learning to adjust to and planning Vada's baptism, I haven't been very blog vocal. I am so happy to say, though, that the girls are now well, February will be over in 4 days, and I was able to get our good ol' laptop up and running to be able to get back on here. Next up is March with the promise of Spring, Lucy's 2nd birthday and an unexpected vacation planned to Amelia Island in April... things are certainly looking up!
A photo highlight of the past few weeks...

 The saving grace of a day remotely close to being warm enough for reading outside

 

Just another day

 

The very rare occurrence to hold Vada for a nap

 

Swinging sisters

 

Valentine's Day was somewhere in the mix too...

 

I plan on devoting another post to what pulled us all through the trenches of February... until then :)

Vada Belle's Baptism

"For this child I prayed, and the LORD has given me what I asked of Him. So now I give her to the LORD. For her whole life, she will belong to the LORD."

1 Samuel 1: 27-28

 

 

 

CENTREVILLE UNITED METHODIST CHURCH
Sunday, February 24, 2012
Pastor Mark Farnell

It is OK

Sometimes, you just have to do what you have to do to get through the day. I used to be harder on myself about it, thinking that any wrong thing I did was going to have lasting consequences on the little souls I am shaping. Welp, not anymore. I have decided it is OK to do some things for your self, your sanity, and the wellbeing of your children.

• to hide in the bathroom to eat the last cupcake
• to let Lucy have a donut for breakfast instead of the green smoothie I made her
• to make a trip to the library for only movies
• to take both kids into the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning
• to leave the baby vomit on the floor for the dog to get
• to get dressed for the day when i see Jameson's car pulling up in the evening
• to not totally hate pumping only when i have a beer in my hand
• to not do what the doctor/ other parents recommend when it comes to taking care of my children
• to adapt the "dangerous or just disgusting" rule one of my friends taught me
• to remind myself that at the end of the day, even when i feel like i failed at everything i attempted, there is still nothing i would rather be doing

Vada at 6 Months

Little miss is now 6 months old! I can not believe how quickly the past six months have passed and that in another six we will be celebrating a first birthday... oh how the time flies.

Vada is more and more herself everyday and seems to have found her voice again, usually squealing or saying "da da." We are still waiting on the belly laughs even though she smiles 90% of her waking time. The exception seems to be men without beards... strange but true. She plays shy when people talk to her, turning into my shoulder with a smile. She will happily play by herself on the floor for long periods of time, as long as she is sitting up. She doesn't roll around much when she is on her back, choosing instead to play with her toes.

She still wakes up every two and a half hours all night to eat but occasionally will do a four hour stretch for me. I am hoping as we start introducing foods her sleep habits will improve but I am in no rush to push food. So far we have tried avocados and bananas which she seemed to like. We also started giving her a sippy cup which she seems to be happier chewing on than drinking. She has yet to pop a tooth but has been putting anything in her mouth she can get her hands on and drooling like crazy. The doctor mentioned at her four month appointment that her teeth were close so I guess they are hiding where ever that belly laugh is too.

She loves to watch her sister and Otis and I can tell she is eager to get in the middle of it all herself. Nursing has become more like a wrestling match with her constantly being distracted by any noise or voice.  I am hoping to start easing her out of sleeping in the swing so she gets used to being in her crib or in bed with us, plus it gives us an excuse to rock more together. At this point, the most memorable thing about this little lady is her smile. She has a huge smile that totally takes up all of her giant cheeks and makes those little eyes nothing more than slits. I love seeing that smile, even in the middle of the night when I go to pick her up for yet another feeding. This month we are looking forward to her baptism and first valentines day, as well as introducing more foods. As much as I love seeing Vada and Lucy interact more, if we could just slow down time a little please, I am so not ready to let go of my baby yet. I love you Vada Belle.